Do you ever think, really think, about your actions when you are alone with no one to judge you? I bet you act differently, right? I thought I would share with you some of the things that I do when I am alone.
–Sing – It is a rarity that I sing in front of anyone. Yet, when I am alone…it is a freaking concert up in this bitch! The house, the car..it doesn’t matter. #britneybitch
–Dance – Literally dance like no one’s watching..because no one is. #dancelikenooneiswatching
–Try on all the clothes — I go through my closet and try on random clothes to see how they look. Usually this is choreographed with some type of dance and model walk to 90’s music. #strutyourstuff
–Talk to myself — If I am working on something, I might think out loud. Or I will audibly say my to do list. #ianswermyselftoo
–Treat the dogs like humans — Just kidding, I do this all the time. You should hear the conversations I have with them. #theyunderstandme
–Flex in the mirror — I have literally worked my ass off to finally see some definition, you better believe I flex like a bro. #doyouevenliftbro
–Indulge in guilty pleasures — I watch all the shows that Chris hates. HGTV or what’s up Kardashians. #trashtv
–Walk around in less clothes — Sometimes I am getting dressed and realize that I left something in the laundry room. No one is there, why bother putting everything back on? Also, fuck pants.
–Win an argument –I might not have been clever enough to make a valid point in a debate, but you better believe I replay that shit when I am alone and come up with 500 things I should have said.
–Spa time — I don’t take bubble baths or do facial masks very often. I try to squeeze them in when I am alone.
–Make food only I like — I have some “weird northern” foods that only I would enjoy eating, now is the time to make it! Also, a cheese plate is a totally acceptable dinner when I am alone.
–Play Just Dance — I look like a damn fool when I play Just Dance, so I like to do it when I know no one is going to catch me.
–Leave the bathroom door open — Why bother closing it? Besides I can hear every noise in the house better with the door open.
–Freak out — Every noise is most assuredly an intruder waiting to murder me.
What do you do when you are alone?
Confessions in ecard:
OCD problems, you don’t know my struggles…
I think I make this face on a daily basis…
Can I get an Amen?
32 Comments
Is it sad that I do these things when people are around? Bathroom door open? YEP, we’re married. In the words of Chris, DEAL WITH IT. Also, yes. Every sound IS a murderer trying to get in the house, and having conversations with dogs, totally acceptable. They’re the only ones that really listen anyway!!
Oh I am always 100% pantless when no one is around…it is great. And my dog totally talks back to me when no one is around 🙂
Love this list! I pretty much do all of the above… I think I remain pantless and braless when I’m alone. I also clean when J is out of the house (i.e. Hide all his shit). A cheese plate is a totally acceptable dinner! You should flex every day, girl! You have worked hard!
Great list. I totally dance around the house when I’m home alone.
Yes to all of this! I can totally come up with some awesome arguments and one liners when I’m alone! And I love dancing around to fun music! Only the dogs can see me and they don’t care! LOL that diet ecard, SO TRUE!
When I’m alone, it’s ALWAYS a straight-up concert…I guess I just can’t shake my old performing days, haha!
I’m always flexing in the mirror haha! Dustin and I have full conversations with Pixie, like we’re talking back & forth for her. Do you guys do this too or are we insane? Maybe you shouldn’t answer that… 😉
haha I’m guilty of several of these, especially having conversations with my dogs!
You are too funny! I sing and mostly RAP when no one is around. I am the most super hardcore, suburban, blonde Mom that you have ever met. What what!
FUCK PANTS. i do the same thing!
i’m so happy at all the progress you and K have made; SO SO Proud so hell yes flex like an ahole bro any chance you get!!
I’m all for leaving the bathroom door open, Tyson disagrees but whatever.
Also when I come home from the beach I strip off my sandy bathing suit in the laundry area and walk to the shower in my birthday suit. Because nobody has time to sweep up bathroom sand.
I need to be doing some face masks. Alone or not.
I think my number one favorite thing about being home alone these days is watching whatever I want! My fiance is always like, “What do you want to watch?” (because we both hate to make the decision) but my choices are limited to things he would actually maybe enjoy. And yeah, singing and dancing happen when I’m alone.
Maybe dogs understand every word, but can’t let on that they do. Easier to get away with lengthy naps and not sharing household chores if humans think that they don’t understand!
I usually think of the perfect thing to say to somebody…two years later…
Oh yeah I so totally do all these! What I really do love is occasionally getting to eat alone so you can eat whatever the heck you want without guilt sometimes I eat normal things but sometimes I just have popcorn, ice cream or cheese, yes I to love cheese too and throw in some grapes. 🙂 your honestly is just so refreshing!! And funny! Thanks for the smiles!
Hahah I seriously think some of these are programmed into human DNA—don’t we ALL win our arguments beautifully when no one else is actually having them with us??—and yet we all hide them away during out solo time. I say we all let our freak flags fly… except singing. I definitely won’t let anyone ever hear me sing.
Hahahaha I do so many of these things! Especially eating all the foods no one else likes, and watching trash TV, and trying on clothes! And obviously leave the door open and walk around with very little clothes on. Because those are a given.
I win ALL THE ARGUMENTS when I’m alone (or in the shower). Although the lack of clothes is applicable when Mr. Scrooge is home, so that’s no worse than normal. I also watch all the things that Mr. Scrooge would never watch while I’m alone and use the bathroom with the door open. Phil likes to check on me while I’m doing my business anyways.. I feel like it’s fair play for me watching him when we’re out for walks.
Bathroom door open all the time! I don’t sing or dance, but I definitely eat weird things because I know no one is watching and it’s too much effort to cook for just one. Dinner lately has been spinach peanut butter smoothies, because whatever. And the dieting being easy card is so perfect! Because on the one hand, eating healthy is super easy. You just keep doing it. But sometimes it sucks and it’s hard as heck, even though conceptually it should be no problem at all.
LOL the same thing happens to me at the gas station without fail! And I hear ya on walking around in less clothes, when someone comes to the door it’s a struggle to run upstairs and put on something appropriate 😛
I do so many of those. Talk to the dogs like people, feel like someone is going to break in and murder me, sing, dance, eat and watch whatever I want. Peeing with the door open is so freeing!! I love when no one is home so I can do that, too. I’ve also been known to take naps in just towels because showering the middle of the day is way better than showering right before bed. I know that’s weird.
Hahaha I always leave the bathroom door open. Who’s gonna stop me?! And I live alone but the only time I really freak out is when someone rings my doorbell. I’m not expecting visitors, so who the hell are you? Obviously a serial killer, because they would really bother with doorbells lol.
I totally treat my dog like a human. Morning face can’t be accurate!
I even let the dogs in when I use the bathroom when home alone. Haaaa!
dance parties all the time. i play with makeup all the time as well. AND my dog undestands me as well. i have to spell out words. I’m crazy. Dog Mamas unite!
Hahah this is awesome! I can relate to so many of these things. Especially the singing one. I never sing in front of people, like ever, but busting it out when I’m alone in the car is one of my favorite things.
#trashtv – yes! I only watch Dance Moms when no one else can actually see that I’m watching it…and I eat like a child. If I want ice cream for dinner, I have ice cream for dinner!
Should I admit that I d a lot of these things even when I’m NOT alone? #noshame
oh man, i love singing like i’m celine dion while i’m alone in the car ha. and of course i have full on conversations with the pugs.
HELL YES to everything! I sing, dance, model, replay arguments in my head, talk to myself and walk around in my underwear whenever I’m alone!
I definitely talk to my dog like she’s a human even if people are around. And my favorite thing to do is walk around in bra and underwear and not get dressed. With the curtains closed of course!
hahaha yes to the door open so i can hear all the sounds of someone coming to kill me! and eat all the bad food that KC hates lol. no shame!! i have never played just dance, but i totally dance like a fool and sick super loudly when i’m alone.