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Nadine, You are Unapproachable

Day 25: Something someone told you about yourself that you’ll never forget (good or bad)

I didn’t really date in middle school or high school. There were boys that I had crushes on or flirted with, and there were guys that I was friends with…but I never had a “boyfriend.” I started dating the summer after I graduated from high school. Most of the people that I have “dated” have been people I met online. At first it was people I met through AIM Chat Rooms (that was the cool thing back then, OK!!!) then in most recent years it was online dating sites. 

I never understood why I never had drinks bought for me, or why I wasn’t hit on while being out often. A lot of my friends have stories about how some guy asked for their number at a bar, or had a silly pick up line while waiting at the meat counter at the grocery store. Nope not me. 

One day when I was in college, I asked one of my really close guy friends why I never met anyone out. I said to be brutally honest with me. Tell me that I am fat, or not friendly….maybe my hair looks wack. Tell me something that I can fix! He looked at me and said, “Nadine, you are unapproachable.” What the hell does that even mean?!

Apparently, I am the nicest person you’d ever meet…if you have the courage to come up and speak to me. He said that to guys I looked like I was either taken or not interested in speaking to guys. That the way I carry myself is with confidence and that it was intimidating to guys. 

I don’t really know how that happened, it wasn’t how I saw myself at all. To this day I am not quite sure what unapproachable even means. I guess I don’t really have to worry about it anymore, I am married now. Ha! I did meet my husband online too, so maybe there is something to his theory. Chris knew I was sweet and interested before he met me. Maybe I would have scared him off otherwise? 

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2 Comments

  • Reply Robin May 25, 2013 at 1:21 pm

    No offense to your friends, but I think the sort of guys who would try to pick someone up at the meat counter are the types who are looking for a “quick screw”. You seem “unapproachable” in the sense that you are very intelligent and kind…men probably sensed that you are not the type who they can use for a cheap “quickie”.

  • Reply criticalcrass May 26, 2013 at 4:01 pm

    i’ve heard more than once that i’m intimidating. the irony is that, so often, around guys i find attractive, i’m horribly intimidated.

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