–I was scrolling through my Facebook feed last week and saw all the first day of school pictures. Then I started paying attention to grades and I was like “hmm she is starting 7th grade. Wait…7th?!?! WTF???? I remember when she was  born!” Then I started doing the math to check to see if that was right…well shit! I feel so old….

–I don’t really like wine. There, I said it. *And all of blog land gasps* Sorry winos I like beer and fruity cocktails. Wine makes me sleepy and usually has a bad aftertaste for me.But just think, if we hang out, you can have all of the wine.

–I eat cupcakes for the icing, I can’t lie. I could do without the cake part, give me all the icing! The cake just gets in my way.

–While we are on the topic of cake, if any of you are wondering what kind of cake to get me for my birthday it would be a cookie cake. Yum! Just call me the cookie monster. Cookie cake is my favorite.

–I feel we should always live by the words of the cookie monster. Freaking genius.

–I often ponder what has happened to our society and how future generations are going to conduct themselves. I was in the break room rinsing my dish in the sink and an intern sighs loudly, and rudely says excuse me as he is moving me out of the way and reaches over me into a cabinet to get a cup. He then proceeds to stay in my way to get some ice. I stood there dumbfounded for a second wondering if that really did just happen. I loudly said “What the fuck?” As he walked away.

Like he didn’t even wait, he just moved me. I was two seconds away from being done. And he is like 12 (ok maybe 20 or 21) but respect your elders dude.So rude!!!!!!

Confessions in ecards:


Funny Confession Ecard: I don't mean to sound like a bitch but... oh wait, yes I do.

Funny Confession Ecard: My dream has always been to become a stay at home mom. Without kids.  ****That's what I'm talking about!!!***

Since you are too classy to pin the hilarious yet inappropriate pins, I'll just pin them all for you. You're welcome.

Funny Confession Ecard: ...that moment when you need to adjust your sleeping position but feel bad becuase your pet is asleep on you.... Thanks quotes o.O

I'm No Superhero: Encapsulating My Placenta for Postpartum Healing. Lots of great sources

Funny Confession Ecard: You had me at 'I hate that bitch too.'

Funny Confession Ecard: I'm actually not funny. I'm just mean and people think I'm joking.

Stalker! I Never feel more vulnerable than when someone likes my Facebook picture from three years ago  ecard, funny, humor, lmao, lol, lmfao, inappropriate, offensive, blunt, quote

Now go link up and get something off your chest.

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  • Reply Jules August 13, 2014 at 12:19 pm

    Umm icing is TOTALLY the best part. And I love cookie cake too. Now I am hungry

  • Reply chelsea August 13, 2014 at 12:31 pm

    “But just think, if we hang out, you can have all of the wine.” Hahaha you are hilarious!

  • Reply kathy@vodka and soda August 13, 2014 at 12:34 pm

    wtf? that dude needs to recognize. someone tried to do that to me once but it was just guy who worked here and he was all huffy waiting behind me so i turned around and said: WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? IF YOU DONT WANT TO WAIT, GO TO THE NEXT KITCHEN DOWN THE HALL.

    and you’re 100% right – the majority of young people these days are rude as fuck. you know our society is going into the shitter when you see nice kids and think “oh, that’s rare; look how nice these kids are!”.

    thanks for linking up!
    Vodka and Soda

  • Reply Lauren August 13, 2014 at 12:55 pm

    No cake and no wine? Then yes, MORE FOR ME! And I can’t throw clothes away but I hate my entire closet so I totally feel that card. I need to purge!

  • Reply katie @ that's for me to know August 13, 2014 at 1:00 pm

    Everytime I get on FB I’m somehow reminded that I am in fact getting old as shit, because my friends have pictures of their kids and babies everywhere, and one is starting like 3rd grade and I was all- I remember when you were born! BORN! Damn, I’m getting old.

  • Reply SMD @ Life According to Steph August 13, 2014 at 1:02 pm

    That intern needs to get his head flushed down the toilet. Rude ass mofo.

    I think it’s weird when people are obsessed with their wine consumption. Like your identity is not tied to what you drink or how often you drink it. Maybe that’s living with an alcoholic that gives me a different point of view, I don’t know.

  • Reply Kristen August 13, 2014 at 1:06 pm

    I am not a huge wine drinker either! partly because I drank like 3 litres in one night on an empty stomach and threw up errywhere, and now i can’t handle the taste. and we are going on a wine tasting for my friends birthday next weekend and i just pretend to like it haha.
    icing on the cupcakes are the best part. yummmm.
    oh my god what a rude prick! doesnt he know he’s a kid and an intern? seriously, he should be embarrassed. ashamed. i’m with kathy, when i see a halfway nice kid i’m like ‘wow, your kid is really nice, and polite. it has manners!’
    judging at the gym is a must! happy wednesday!

  • Reply Joey August 13, 2014 at 1:10 pm

    Okay, I’ll scrape off my icing if you’ll give me your cake. I love cake. Just the cake. I don’t need the frosting. ha. That story about the intern is insane. INSANE. What the heck? I like your ecards. i was nodding my head along haha!

  • Reply Kelli August 13, 2014 at 1:12 pm

    I’d have gotten fired for kicking intern in the teeth while yelling WTF. Hahaha but seriously young “professionals” can be so damn rude.

  • Reply Kateri Von Steal August 13, 2014 at 2:14 pm

    Cookie CAKE! OH MAN. The cake I made for my dad was a white cake, with chocolate chips and strawberries… So.. not exactly COOKIES.. but darn close!

    And all of the ecards made me giggle today.. each and every one of them!

    OH, and do I need to bitch slap an intern? Cause I’ll do it 😉

  • Reply Nats ~ coraltintedperceptions August 13, 2014 at 2:42 pm

    I don’t like wine, well the good wine, I like sweet, fruity drinks where I can’t taste the alcohol lol

  • Reply Biana Perez August 13, 2014 at 3:36 pm

    The generation right after mine (i’m 27) is so terrible so like the age of your intern…they are just so rude and totally socially inept – not all of them but the ones that I have come across. I love icing as well…and probably eat it for that!!

  • Reply Helene August 13, 2014 at 3:43 pm

    I’m into wine but not coffee- haha! gotta do what you gotta do!

  • Reply Kerry August 13, 2014 at 4:22 pm

    I can’t believe he rudely pushed you out of the way. People are so much more impatient. Yes, I let other people post the inappropriate pins and then laugh at them.

    I always feel guilty when I need to move and my pup is at the end of the bed because I know he will move no matter if it is just a smidge.

  • Reply Kate August 13, 2014 at 4:38 pm

    We’d be the perfect pair because I eat cupcakes for the cake! I like icing when its just the regular kind bought at the store but I don’t like fancy cupcake shop icing!

  • Reply Lindsay | Broke and Bougie August 13, 2014 at 4:43 pm

    NO WINE?? I can respect it though. And YAS gimme all the cookie cake too, and the frosting off the cupcakes!!

  • Reply Liz @ Fitness Blondie August 13, 2014 at 5:16 pm

    Your e-cards make my life, they are hilarious. I agree about life’s too short to finish a bad book. That is why I tossed “The Happiness Project” out of the window. I am opposite of you on cupcakes; I like the BREAD part. LOL. Weird, I know, haha.

  • Reply brooke lyn August 13, 2014 at 6:35 pm

    i will take the cake part if you eat the icing for me!

  • Reply Jackie August 13, 2014 at 7:14 pm

    Girl, I don’t like wine at all either. I think it tastes gross.

  • Reply Amanda Elizabeth August 13, 2014 at 11:39 pm

    You know my thoughts on like all of this….frosting is the best part, no worries you have beer and I’ll drink wine …..and those youths….honestly I would have splashed that stupid ass with water WTF???????

  • Reply Amanda August 14, 2014 at 12:57 am

    I’m not a big wine girl either! I like to maybe have a sip or two of cool fruity kinds but overall… you’ll never catch me ordering it.
    Cupcakes are far superior to cake. The frosting ratio is much better!!!!

  • Reply Jana @ Jana Says August 14, 2014 at 1:39 am

    I love you. This post is exactly why we’re friends. EXACTLY. Because yes to all of it.

    I don’t like wine either and there is no point in a cupcake without frosting.

  • Reply Teh Megan August 14, 2014 at 3:38 am

    I don’t like beer OR wine. I get so much shit all the time and I have to tell people the same thing. Someone had to remind me that school is starting soon and I was so out of it that I had no idea. Whatevs. And those ecards, 90% of them describe my life.

  • Reply Krystal August 14, 2014 at 3:45 am

    haha so much yes to the first one. When I see people born like yester-bloody-day entering high school I think… Damn Krys you’re old!

  • Reply Stephanie August 14, 2014 at 3:15 pm

    Ugh that intern, I would have smacked him! lol at all those ecards, love them. Particularly the “I don’t mean to sound like a bitch…” So me!

  • Reply Tricia Coniglio August 14, 2014 at 7:51 pm

    Aggghhhh! I lose my whole book of a comment! I was saying that I wanted ice cream cake for my bday but didn’t get it. Should I get it this weekend instead? I hope your bday is awesome and that a cookie cake miraculously appears for you.

    I have a friend whose daughter is about to graduate high school! I did the same thing as you and calculate if that really means I am that old! Yep. I am. Thankfully, she had her daughter young but still!

  • Reply B @ The Sequin Notebook August 14, 2014 at 8:08 pm

    Haha could not agree more about cake being a hindrance to the icing…let’s just skip the cake and head straight to the good stuff!

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